Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come back.” The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’; for you have had five husbands, and the one you have now is not your husband. What you have said is true!” The woman said to him, “Sir, I see that you are a prophet. Our ancestors worshiped on this mountain, but you say that the place where people must worship is in Jerusalem.”- John 4:16-20

I am not sure which is worse; being in an unhappy relationship or being alone. Our children and teens understand this dilemma more than us. They are confronted with it all the time. They ran away from their unhappy families and found themselves all alone in the streets. They were free from oppression but loneliness was too heavy a burden to bear. They have to find a way to be part of a group even if it meant doing something immoral to become part of it. Anything is better than being left all alone in this world. In the meantime, they are aware that the companionship that is also fragile and temporal. It is based on a common desire to be connected with another fellow being. It is not a strong enough thread to hold them together. The possibility of a rupture is always present. Loneliness always plagues them. They use drugs to forget its reality, but they do not help. They sense their isolation even more when they are high. Loneliness never abandons them. It is not just a reality for our children. It is something we all share as human beings; the fear of being alone.

The Samaritan woman from the gospel text tried desperately to overcome her loneliness. Jesus revealed that He knows that she had been married five times and now she was a concubine. He wasn’t trying to shame her; neither was the woman offended by his statement. To the contrary, she was even more amazed that Jesus spoke to her. She was ostracized by her community for many reasons. For a Jewish person only one was sufficient. She was a Samaritan. Jewish people did not have anything to do with Samaritans. Despite this, Jesus wanted her to give Him a cup of water. Sharing a cup was quite intimate back then. They wash the cup like we do today. It was a common cup and one she most likely drank from. Jesus wanted to share this cup. Perhaps, He wanted her to be part of His reward.

“whoever gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones in the name of a disciple—truly I tell you, none of these will lose their reward.”- Matthew 10:42

Besides being a Samaritan, this woman was also marginalized from her community. She could not draw water from the well at the regular time. She had to go when there was no one around. She did not expect a Jewish person to be sitting by the well, let alone talk to her. Jesus mentioned her past to let her know that neither her ethnicity nor her reputation were going to hinder Him from talking to her.

It appears as if she drastically changed the subject from her past to a religious topic. This is not the case. She did not change the subject. It was Jesus who did it. He recognized something noble in her. Something, perhaps others have overlooked. She was a person who did not fear facing the Truth even when it wasn’t favorable to her. It did not necessarily mean that she was going to change her lifestyle. This is a misconception. People think that just mere knowledge of the Truth will transform the person. We have people who know right from wrong and yet deliberately commit the most detrimental actions. Unfortunately knowing the Truth does not automatically erase loneliness. It doesn’t free us from the fear of living a life in isolation and anonymity. These were the fears behind this woman’s decision. It is not just her. It is something that all of us are very capable of doing. She did not marry five men and then settle to being something less for the sake of pleasure. It was because she did not want to be alone and forgotten in this world. Ironically her desperate actions consequently isolated her from the rest of the world. Something our children and teens can understand. If Jesus was in the streets where we minister, He would most likely ask for a glass of water from them even though He knows that it might not come from the most hygienic source.

Jesus showed the woman that He was willing to receive what she had to give Him, even if the rest of the world thought that it was scandalous and even ceremonially unclean. He wanted to show that He understood her. He knew everything about her and He understood her and accepted what she had to offer. This opened the door for her to share her deepest concern. She wanted to know about the Truth that would liberate her. She did not change the subject of the conversation. She brought it to a deeper level. She wanted to know if her worship could fulfill the void she sensed in her soul. She wanted to know the right answer to overcome the loneliness that had plagued her all her life. Maybe she thought the answer was found in the Truth spoken in the Law. To be honest, the answer that Jesus gave did not make anything clearer.

“The hour is coming, and is now here, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for the Father seeks such as these to worship him. God is spirit, and those who worship him must worship in spirit and truth.” -John 4:23-24

I searched for the answer perhaps through our interactions with the children this last week. We had many pleasant and enriching encounters. However, they did not make this particular subject clearer to me. Then, on Saturday, I received a call from Felipe. He ran out of money for food. There was an emergency. One of his wife’s children injured his foot and they had to rush to the hospital. Thankfully, it wasn’t too serious; a couple of stitches resolved the problem. Nevertheless, taxi costs money and all their limited resource was depleted. Thankfully, we have more than we need so we were able to share. We decided to meet near my home. It was a nice day. Mary was under the weather due to a weak cold. We thought that with the present state of events it would be best if she rested at home. I asked Felipe if he wanted to go on a walk. He was more than willing. On the weekends, a highway bridge running along the center is closed to cars and it becomes a pedestrian walk way. It is about two miles long. We walked on it. It was great to have this time just to talk about anything that came into our minds. Recently, Felipe has developed this intense desire to learn and improve himself. He was asking me question after question. One was of an ethical nature. He asked me if we saw someone leading a self-destructive lifestyle should we confront them with the Truth? I honestly told him that I am not sure if we have the ability to convince anyone to do anything. Each person decides for themselves what they believe to be the best. Since we are not them, we cannot comprehend their reasoning and help them see things as we see it. Felipe pondered briefly on what I said and he responded, “It is better for them to come to the realization themselves.” I agreed. Then he asked what is our responsibility towards them. It was a difficult question to give an adequate answer. Maybe the answer is the answer Jesus gave to the Samaritan woman. We need allow the God who is Spirit to draw us unto Himself so that our lives will permeate with the Grace of the Spirit and the Truth. I actually said these exact words to Felipe. He understood. I think that I understood too. God used this conversation to make things a little clearer for me.

Jesus spoke to the Samaritan woman not to remind her of her own faults. He made it very clear to His disciples that He did not come to condemn but to bring healing. This does not come by pointing out the symptoms of illness. It comes from addressing the deep rooted desire of all people. The woman sensed in Jesus the answer she was seeking. It wasn’t expressed in His words. It was Him. His acceptance of her and His desire to share her cup despite her being a Samaritan, revealed to her that perhaps the answer she is looking for is open and available to her too. Jesus worshipped the Father in Spirit and Truth and this opened the eyes of this lost and lonely soul to communion with the One who will never abandon or reject her.

After my walk with Felipe, I felt that I participated in true worship even though I know that the next day I won’t be able to go to church because of the present pandemic. Regardless of this, God still met me where I was.