He put before them another parable: ‘The kingdom of heaven is like a mustard seed that someone took and sowed in his field; it is the smallest of all the seeds, but when it has grown it is the greatest of shrubs and becomes a tree, so that the birds of the air come and make nests in its branches.’ Matthew 13:31-32

We live in a new neighborhood. Our route to where we meet the children is different now. Our walk now is extended to forty minutes. It may seem like a long time but it is not uncommon here. Most people don’t have cars. Almost everyone in our apartment building doesn’t own one. We are all pedestrians. Besides, the walk is quite interesting but definitely not beautiful. In fact, it is full of ugly and disturbing scenes even though there is some beautiful architecture splattered along the way. We have to pass an area that was notoriously known as the “Mouth of the Trash”, although this nickname has been dropped recently because it is not good for tourism. The area is still not good for tourism but that doesn’t stop the local government from promoting it. Like I said before, it is an interesting but slightly disturbing walk.

The area has changed a lot over the past decade. In the past, there were gambling dens and brothels, not to mention shootouts over the control of these. Most of the gambling places have been shut down. The brothels are still around but thankfully no more shootouts. As for the odd and suspicious characters, they are still around. Many are crack addicts. They usually clump together to use their poison. It is quite sad. It is even sadder when we meet someone among them. This was the unfortunate case. It was a young teen whom we used to meet with the other homeless children. He was begging outside a convenience store and saw us. His first reaction was precious. He waved at us and gave us a big beautiful smile. No one could resist this spontaneous welcome. He was emaciated and dressed in filthy apparel. Anyone seeing him would immediately identify him as a crack addict. I could not hide my sadness and he picked up on it. We spoke for a few seconds and almost immediately he emotionally shut down. He started staring at the floor and asked us to let him be. I was taken aback but decided to respect his wishes. We shook his hands and left him alone. I was a little offended naturally. It bothered me as we walked the rest of the way to our destination.
I was more bothered by the fact that he asked us to leave than his present state. I suppose that it is a very human reaction. None of us like outright rejection.

We had planned to visit some of the youth who have managed to rent rooms in the center. It may seem like they have left their homeless situation. The fact is that the only change is that they are sleeping in a tiny room but they continue to live like they did when they were in the streets. This again is the major difference a person who spent their infancy homeless and an adult who became homeless. Our children and teens have no or very little memory of living in a sheltered place. They never had a real home where they can go to rest and be safe from the world. For them, this concept is foreign. The rooms they rent are just for sleeping after they spend the night in the streets.

When we arrived there, there was about ten of them squeezed in a room about 11 square meters ( 100 square feet for those not familiar with the metric system). It is more like a cubicle than a room. They pay more for it for square foot than we do for our apartment. The whole system is very unjust but this is not part of today’s story. There were about ten of them squeezed into this tiny room and every space was taken. They were all sleeping except for one who opened the door. He couldn’t even open the door fully for fear of hitting someone sleeping on the floor. It was Daniel.

I mentioned Daniel recently. I won’t repeat myself here but just say that he just got out of prison about two weeks ago. He was absolved of all crime which means that he has a clean record. We have known this boy since he was ten and now he is just turned 21 a few weeks ago. Daniel came and out gave us a big hug. Our voices were heard by the neighbors and a curious young boy ran out to see us. From his disappointed look, we assumed that he was expecting someone else. He looked like a child of an immigrant. Daniel said something to him and he ran away. We went to the area where everyone hung their laundry. We found a spot in between the clothes to talk. Some people even looked out of the window to make sure that we were not some dubious characters trying to steal their clothes. We passed the test.

Daniel told us that he was trying to reconnect with his family. He is staying with his twin sister. He comes to the streets to see his friends for a few days a week. He misses them. This is quite understandable. Most of the youth with whom Daniel grew up in the streets are not involved in crime. They use drugs but not hard drugs. He shared briefly about his time in prison without going into too much detail. He said that it was a place full of hatred and bitterness. He told himself never again. The charges were dropped because the victim did not want to press charges. She was a foreign tourist. Daniel felt that he was given a new chance and he was grateful to God for it. As we talked, it became obvious that Daniel’s major motivation to stop doing crime was the fear of punishment. This might be a good thing for the world. However, it does not suffice for the Kingdom of God.

“When an impure spirit comes out of a person, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it. Then it says, ‘I will return to the house I left.’ When it arrives, it finds the house unoccupied, swept clean and put in order. Then it goes and takes with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there. And the final condition of that person is worse than the first. That is how it will be with this wicked generation.” Matthew 12 : 43-45

I shared this parable with him. We explained that it was not enough just to have a clean house but we need to fill it with new life-giving things. He was confused. He asked if a person who stopped doing bad things can still end up in hell. I understand where he is coming from. In the streets, we hear a version of Christianity preached by itinerant preachers. It is a message of a punitive religion. There is hardly anything about the Kingdom of God. It is just about cleaning one’s house. We don’t need the gospel to clean our house; psychotherapy, medication, and many other resources are available to do the job. The Gospel is not about house cleaning. It is about New Life. It is about living the reality of Jesus in our everyday life. I explained to Daniel that St Paul tells us that new life means those who once stole now ought to do good things with their hands. The victim did not testify against him but he still did something that was damaging to his soul. He hurt someone else deliberately. Daniel listened carefully. I know that he did not fully comprehend. It will take time to sink in and we are not in a hurry. We have spent ten years with this young man. Maybe it might be another ten years. For now, we can see a small seed is planted. He is thinking about what it means to go beyond having a clean house.

We prayed together and before we left, I told him about the boy we met that told us to leave him alone. Daniel shook his head and said, “That was the drugs talking.” Now it was Daniel’s turn to teach me about the Kingdom of God. I had been thinking about how hurtful his words were and I forgot to look at him with compassionate eyes. The poor boy is suffering and he could not handle the scrutiny of our eyes even though we were not judging him. His own conscious was tormenting him. I missed it because my eyes did not see and my ears did not hear. Thankfully Daniel’s simple words brought me back to reality. Daniel insisted on walking out with us and just as we said our goodbyes, he gave us a big hug and said that he was glad we could have our talk together. He promised to call us again soon.

The Kingdom of God is present and real every where. Usually in the small everyday things and common interactions with people whether these are good or bad. Sometimes we miss it because we forget how to look for it. It is perceived through compassionate eyes.

And the slaves of the householder came and said to him, “Master, did you not sow good seed in your field? Where, then, did these weeds come from?” He answered, “An enemy has done this.” The slaves said to him, “Then do you want us to go and gather them?” But he replied, “No; for in gathering the weeds you would uproot the wheat along with them. Let both of them grow together until the harvest; and at harvest time I will tell the reapers, Collect the weeds first and bind them in bundles to be burned, but gather the wheat into my barn.” Matthew 13:27-30

It is the school vacation in Brazil. The local government has spent months prior “cleaning up” the area for the tourists. Coincidentally the area where we meet with the children is also where this largest city in South America was founded. There is a minute monument to indicate the center point where the city started all its construction. They call it “marco zero” and frankly speaking I can’t find an appropriate term for it in English. Let’s just call it the “center point”. It’s an obligatory photo spot for social media fanatics. Just a few months ago, anyone with their mobile phone out would have lost it within seconds, not to mention gold chains and other valuables. Now we have about twenty police standing around this tiny monument. Besides these, we have tons of them on motorcycles doing their rounds. All the homeless adults were made to leave the area even though it is common knowledge that the homeless adults are not prone to criminal activities. The ones who steal are usually the children and teens, more precisely some of our children and teens. Now the homeless are scattered around somewhere in the area. The children and teens are not allowed to be seen at all. At the present state, one would easily think that are no children and teens sleeping in the streets. Just a few months ago, there were at least a couple of hundred of them.

Ever since last year, we have seen an influx of children from the orphanages here. They came in loads and eventually dominated the scene. Children have a different way of behaving in the streets than the homeless adults. These have a history of family life and many have held jobs before. They tend to bring all these experiences to the streets. Our children start from zero. In a way, the fact that they live and sleep around “center point” is symbolic. This is where our children construct their understanding of human relationships and ethics from zero. Their first instances in the street are always chaotic. They behave like the children from Golding’s book, “Lord of the Flies”. However, this is not the moment to judge them. The weeds and wheat look the same at this point. It is hard to tell. Nevertheless, it is good to remember that there are weeds present. It is a dreadful mistake to romanticize the situation and say that they are all wheat. This attitude might sound beautiful and compassionate but it is a recipe for future disappointment and frustration. It is good to listen the wisdom of Jesus. He prepares us for real life and not life as we would like it. There are always weeds among the wheat.

Needless to say, with the all children going into hiding, our work has become a little complicated. However, this is a cycle we have encountered before. The government is not geared towards solving long term problems. They are satisfied with short term solutions and violence and brute force are the way they achieve it. The cycle starts every few years. The government sends the police to flex their muscles hoping that all the deep rooted societal problems will disappear. It is an illogical process but adopted by many nations. We know that things will soon return back to the state it was before. Despite all this, we still meet a few of the children everyday. In a way, it gives us a chance to spend more quality time with a smaller group. However, it still makes us curious to know where all the two hundred or so children and teens have gone. The ones we manage to find tell us that they spend the whole day wandering around the center. Some sleep under the bridge until it is evening. It still doesn’t account for many. We have enquired if some have decided to return to the orphanage but no one can give us an answer on the matter. We decided to wait for them in the area. They can always find us here.

There is always lots of yelling and noise in the streets. We usually just ignore it but this time I felt that someone was yelling for our attention. We turned around and a tiny boy appeared on a bicycle. Even though he is still a rather small fellow, he was even tinier a few months ago. His name is Lucas. He can’t be more than ten. He was one of the new immigrants to the streets from the orphanages. I always thought that he suffered from autism. Usually he is completely unaware of people around. Many times he walked passed us without saying a word. His face always was void of emotion. However, now he was smiling and he even gave us a hug and gave Mary an affectionate peck on the cheek. He looked all clean and healthy. He claimed that he was back home. We are not sure what this meant. We knew that he always was in an orphanage. Maybe the orphanage meant home for him. We asked him some questions but his mind wasn’t able to process a coherent answer. Still it was good to see him and was even more special that he called out after us. He asked where we have been the past two weeks. I was surprised that he noticed our absence. We were around but he did not see us and immediately assumed that we were away. It makes senses in a way especially for someone like him. Lucas went off without saying goodbye. We are used to it. I still wonder if this cute little boy would be considered a weed or wheat. His adorable appearance hides the fact that he is an expert pickpocket and thief; one that would make Dicken’s the Artful Dodger look like an amateur.

Many in this city will say that all our children are weeds. The government considers all the homeless adults and children in this area to be weeds. This is why they removed them from the area. Now the area seems clean but it is also appears to be dead and sterile. All the life here is gone because of some weeds.

Some people consider a dandelion to be a weed. In many cultures people eat them and considere them to be beneficial plants for our health. Lamentably, many people go after them with a vengeance and discard them as useless plants because they fail to understand their importance. Just because we think something is a weed it doesn’t mean it is. Therefore, we need to know the difference between weeds and wheat. Normally, weeds just take the nutrients without producing any fruit whereas wheat produces fruit which we consider beneficial for life. Of course, this leads us to the problem of defining what it means to produce fruits.

We live in a result oriented world or at least most of us do. I used to think of fruits as results. To be honest, this idea still lingers in me. However, Jesus did many things which did not produce results. For example, He healed many and cast out demons but it did not save him from being accused falsely and crucified. Jesus never did miracles to prove His divinity. He did them to bring abundant life to those who were ill and downtrodden. Since Jesus is our example, it would be wise for us to consider fruits as something we produce to make life more joyful and fulfilling, not just for ourselves but for life in general. Nothing does this better than Love. Wheat are people who bring love to others in this life. They bring joy and peace to this world just like our Lord did and is doing. Weeds just feed on this love and does not produce anything to make life more abundant. To the contrary, sometimes they make it unpleasant and dreadful. In our life experience, many of us have encountered weeds and wheat. However, not everything that appears to be like a weed is a weed. Therefore, we should not waste our time trying to identify which is which. This is not our duty. Jesus loved everyone the same and many of them turned against him. He did not try to distinguish the weeds from the wheat. He loved them all the same. He is our example to live our lives like wheat.

There are many homeless weeds in the streets. There are many homeless wheat too. Thankfully, it is not our task to discern who is who. I am just grateful that a boy who apparently seemed oblivious to our existence said that he missed our presence. A simple statement which gave us hope and renewed our spirit. Maybe Lucas is a wheat after all.

That same day Jesus went out of the house and sat beside the lake. Such great crowds gathered around him that he got into a boat and sat there, while the whole crowd stood on the beach. And he told them many things in parables, saying: ‘Listen! A sower went out to sow.’ Matthew 13:1-3

We just moved to a new place. We rented an apartment a little smaller than our previous one. As a result, not everything was coming with us. We had to give up some things and surprisingly it wasn’t too difficult a process. It was about time we freed ourselves of certain things in order to embrace new and possibly better ones. I suppose this is going to happen more and more in the future. As we grow older, we won’t be able to carry so much as when we were young. Many things will have to be given up and eventually they will all be gone. However, this is not the present concern, for now, we have some rearranging. The old things are going to find a new places to occupy in our new apartment.

We couldn’t find a proper place for our full length mirror. We decided to hang in the same place as in our previous apartment: in the hallway. This way we can take one last look at ourselves before we leave for the streets. After all who wants to go out of their house looking like a slob. However, there is something strangely symbolic too. It is there to remind us to look at ourselves first before we start looking at others. One thing is obvious though. When I look at myself in the mirror, I realize that I have changed a lot. I have more gray hairs and look much older than I feel. I don’t mind it and it wouldn’t matter if I did. I have no control over it. There has been some major changes in me spiritually, too. Our ministry has transformed us. I am happy to say this. After all, any spiritual endeavor is a venture to meet God and every encounter with God is transformative. I think I am beginning to have a better grasp of reality. This is important. We can only bear good fruits when we are grounded in reality.

Just as we were about to leave for the streets, we received a call from Daniel. For those who have accompanied us through the years, his name will be not unfamiliar. It will also not be a surprise when we say that he is definitely our favorite among the homeless youth. We have known him since he was ten. He just turned 20 a few weeks ago. We always had a strong connection with him. I would say that he is one of the sweetest homeless youth but not necessarily the wisest. He is an intelligent young man. However, intelligence and wisdom are not the same thing. In his teens, he spent some time in the juvenile detention but only on one occasion. This is quite rare for most of the children and teens. He did not commit any crime. He went into the public bathroom and two other teens went in after him with stolen items. Daniel came out and was arrested. Much later the victim said that he wasn’t the perpetrator and he was released after six months without any charges. Recently, he was arrested again. Unfortunately, this time he went to regular jail. His crime was his poor choice of companions. He spent three months in prison awaiting trial. Eventually he was absolved from all charges and released a week ago. We haven’t seen him for months. He told us that he was living with his twin sister and was going to figure out what do with his life. He wants to do something better with his life. It is a noble attempt and one in which we encouraged. The reality is that it is not going to be an easy task. In all likelihood, he will not to be able to do this on the first try even though he has good intentions. It will be a long journey. This is fine. Everything good takes time and patience. It is important he reached out to us. However, we did not say all this to him. He had something to say to us. He wanted us to know that he always treasured and loved us. It was completely unexpected. Nevertheless, it was something that we really needed to hear. We were worried that being in prison might have had a negative effect on Daniel. We have seen this happen many times among the other youth. They usually come out worse than when they entered. However, Daniel is a different kind of soil. He has shown over the years that there is much love in his heart. There are always good fruits flowing out of this young man despite the unfavorable situations.

Before we left the house, I took a good look at the mirror and asked myself, “what kind of soil am I?” Unlike Daniel, I have always been in a good and favorable environment for most parts of my life. Most of the time, I have been concerned about creating favorable situations rather than bearing good fruits. Of course, there has always been some confusion about the fruits. I was taught in my early years in the church that fruits were winning souls for Christ. Now, there is an older person in the mirror. I am mature enough to know that no one wins anyone over to Christ. Jesus calls them through the Spirit. The Only Person who is able to conquer the hearts and minds of people is the Holy Spirit. Therefore, what are the fruits which we are supposed to bear? There are tons of pat answers for this inquiry but the man in the mirror is old enough to know that there are no easy answers. However, the solution will not come if I keep staring at the mirror. It is time to leave the building.

We still can walk to where we meet the children and teens. The only difference is that now it is a forty minute walk. The exercise will be beneficial for us. Besides, it is an interesting walk but not necessarily a pleasant one. We have to pass some areas which remind us why we are here. There are crack addicts scattered around. Tons of homeless people and lots of unpleasant stenches. The addicts don’t bother anyone but they are still a disturbing and tragic sight. Usually it is hard to walk by the homeless adults without someone begging for money. It gets a little difficult because we feel like callous and hard hearted people when we refuse to give anything. However, on an average we pass about twenty people or more begging for money. It is enough to make anyone go broke. Besides some people just think of us as a bank machine. They forget that we are also human beings. The process of dehumanization is a two way street.

The homeless children and youth are not very different. I mentioned that there are about hundred to two hundred children and teens sleeping in the streets where we minister. However, most of them don’t treat people outside their own circles like human beings. Consequently, people who walk past the area treat the children like dangerous wild animals. There is a lot of dehumanizing going around. Perhaps, in this environment, it becomes clearer and more obvious what it means to bear fruit for the Kingdom of God. We have to figure out the kind of fruits which best reflect the true meaning of the Kingdom in the environment we find ourselves. It is quite pointless to listen to the preacher or theologian living thousands of miles away from our reality giving us their opinions on spiritual fruits. We have to figure it out in the reality we find ourselves. Maybe bearing fruits has to do with listening intently to the voice of the Holy Spirit. We can not afford to outsource this essential part of our spirituality. This is my opinion. Everyone has to figure it out for themselves.

We are still not accustomed to walking forty minutes to work. I mean it is not terrible but we do get a little tired when we get to our destination. We found a old familiar face which we haven’t seen for a long time where the kids hangout. His name is Wagner. He is an eccentric fellow. It is worth telling his story for another time. He is part of triplets and all of them have lived in the streets since their early childhood. Wagner is about 25 now. He stays more with the homeless adults than the teens. When he saw us, he shouted out aloud as if to announce to everyone; “After all these years they are still at it doing the same thing. What patience!!!” I will take it as a compliment. It could go the other way. Maybe he thinks that we are wasting our time. The other homeless adults smiled and gave us their nods of approval. However, I disagree with Wagner. It is not the same things exactly. The same people or group, perhaps, but it is always different. There is always something new to learn.

‘But to what will I compare this generation? It is like children sitting in the market-places and calling to one another, “We played the flute for you, and you did not dance; we wailed, and you did not mourn.”
For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, “He has a demon”; the Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, “Look, a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax-collectors and sinners!” Yet wisdom is vindicated by her deeds.’ Matthew 11:16-19

I remember sitting at a dining table and listening to a group of older men talking about how the younger generation lacked good sense and values. They were talking about me. I was the younger generation then. I thought that their criticism was unjust and I was thinking about a few comebacks. However, I was brought up in an Asian culture where we were taught to be respectful to our elders. I decided to keep my thoughts to myself. Besides they were also paying for my dinner. If I had my chance, I would have said that the present generation was reaping the sins of the previous one. Now, I have switched sides. I did not know how but it just happened. Recently, I was talking with my friend about how the younger generation was lacking the values and virtues which our generation cherished so much. I guess that it is always easy to see the speck in someone’s eyes while ignoring the log sticking out of one’s own eyes. The reality is that no generation is virtuous nor depraved completely. However, in every generation the Eternal Light is present. Unfortunately, sometimes we can be so obsessed with our self-righteousness that we fail to recognize this Light altogether. As Christians, we are called to be different. Anyone can point out the ills of a generation but we need wisdom to recognize the presence of the Light of the World in all times and seasons.

Just this week I was challenged with an interesting question. It was from a friend who identifies himself as a non-Christian but is constantly haunted by his Christian upbringing. These are his words. I have to say that it is a very original way of describing oneself. He elaborated that he found his religious upbringing to be one which was oppressive and which he gladly rejected. However, he finds himself drawn to Christians who lived their lives radically in their evangelical vocation. His personal heroes are John Wesley and the Christian philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard. His question was how and why the person of Jesus was universally relevant for all times and peoples. It was a sincere enquiry and he was really asking this in relation to our ministry. He wanted to know why I thought Jesus was relevant to the lives of our homeless children and teens. In reality, the question is one that every Christian needs to consider before engaging any evangelistic endeavor.

Frankly speaking, I never heard a question framed this way before. I needed time to construct an appropriate answer when one of my friends who was listening blurted out the best possible answer. This particular friend had identified himself as agnostic until recently. He struggled for a long time with the doctrines and practices of the church of his upbringing. For a long period, he confused God with the doctrinal image of his particular religious denomination. During his wanderings in his own spiritual desert, he reencountered Jesus. He responded that the person of Jesus is the one who helps him understand God’s living presence in this world. There was a time when he just understood the doctrines about Jesus but his rereading of the gospels helped him encounter there the person of Jesus in the lives of people living according to the guidance of the Holy Spirit. I have to admit that his answer was better than any I could have offered. Mainly because when I met him ten years ago, he was bordering on becoming a full fledged atheist but now he is defending the universal relevance of Jesus. I just had one thing to add, “This is why I am in the streets with the homeless children and teens. I want to see Jesus in a real and personal way.”

Every ministry whether it is serving food at the soup kitchen or visiting a homebound friend or neighbor or a ministry like ours among the homeless is an opportunity for us to meet the living Christ. More than an opportunity, this is the primary motivation for us to engage in these ministries. This is perhaps what separates Christian ministry and good works. There is nothing wrong with people who do good works. We need them and we should laud them for their dedication. However, there is something more sacramental in Christian ministry. It flows out of our liturgical experience at the Lord’s table. Since I am an Anglican priest, I will write as one. In our tradition, we refrain from defining how He manifests Himself in our worship. The central focus is our assurance in His words that when two or three are gathered, He is present. This faith-induced confidence compels us to go out into the world and identify Jesus in our midst. It is the source of our wisdom. The world can see problems and despair clearly. However, we have the Light of Christ in us and He helps us to identify and testify His presence in this world. I, very much like the older people in my past, acted like the rest of the world. I was impressed with the darkness. However, my faith compels me to seek the One who is present and alive in all periods of history. There is no generation void of His living presence despite all the problems and difficulties they bear. Unfortunately, we have eyes but sometimes we don’t see and ears but sometimes we don’t hear. Thankfully, every Sunday, at His table, the Healer of our souls can and will open our eyes and ears to see His everlasting Grace living and active in this world.

We had a slow week in the streets. There is lots of police action. The local governor wants to clean up the center so that the tourists can return. We have seen this movie before. There is active police presence and then it slowly diminishes and the center is abandoned. It sounds cynical on my part. Unfortunately, this has been happening for the past thirty years. As Albert Einstein once wisely stated,

“We can’t expect things to change, if we continue doing the same things.”

There were moments where it seemed like there were more police than civilians in the streets. In Brazil, we have wide array of police; municipal guards, military police, special forces police…they were all there. Consequently, all our children and teens have disappeared. They are not gone but in hiding. We saw one or two who were brave enough to venture out. We stayed where we always meet them. We don’t know where they are but it is important that they know where they can find us. We had a slow day yesterday where we hardly saw anyone. On our way home, a man called out to us. At first we thought perhaps he was going to ask for directions. Instead, he just wanted to talk. He worked in the local district attorney office. He commented that he had seen us for years working with the children and teens and always wanted to get to know us. He asked if we were part of some social agency. I said that we were with the Anglican Church and our purpose is to be a spiritual presence among the children. Before I could elaborate further, he interrupted and said that he was not a Christian but he always admired the things we did with the homeless youth. He is also an artist and hoped that maybe one day he could share with us his artistic work in relation with the homeless children. He kept repeating that he has seen us for years and always desired to have contact with us.

We thought that our day was uneventful but in the least expected way, Jesus showed Himself to us through this man. Even when nothing apparently happens, something also occurs when our actions spring forth from a desire to meet the living Christ.

“He who receives you receives Me, and he who receives Me receives Him who sent Me.” Matthew 10:40

I have never seen a tiny baby with so many tubes going in and coming out of his body. He is almost a year old but he still looks like a premature baby. Perhaps it is a lack of nutrition. His mother looks anaemic too. Sometimes I wonder if there is something wrong with her and not just physically. She is the quietest of the three daughters. I do not believe she ever said a word to me. I thought that there was something wrong with her mentally and I am still not sure. Maybe it is because she has spent almost her whole life sleeping in the streets like her mother, the baby’s grandmother. She was the one who called us about Robert. She wanted us to visit him in the intensive care.

I asked the grandmother to join me in prayer. The baby heard my voice and opened his tiny eyes. He looked around and then made a distressed face before bursting out crying. However, it was completely silent. His grandmother explained that was because of the tubes. This is little Robert’s harsh introduction to life. I wish I could say that life is going to get better. It will in a small way for now. The doctor said that he was recovering and in a day or so he will be out of intensive care. Unfortunately, the sad truth is life will always be tough for little Robert. I prayed that God will help the little baby to understand that he is much loved and not alone.

His mother wasn’t in the room. She had stayed in the hospital two days straight and now it was his grandmother’s turn and then his aunt will take over. They have everything arranged. They are very organized when it comes to taking care of the children. This family alone has 6 children under five and all the mothers are under twenty one. There was a time when all of them slept in tents in the streets; all three generations in big one tent sleeping in the cold and dangerous streets. We actually helped them to buy the tent. It was the best option then. Now, they found a small room. There are several homeless youths who have done this. Recently, the government is giving aid to these families. It is not much. Maybe about two weeks grocery money. Some of the homeless youth and families now are taking advantage of this and trying to rent small rooms in the city center. Our ministry is developing in this sense. We now make home visits to these young people. The rent for these rooms are exorbitantly high and, of course, highly unjust. The rooms are tiny cubicles in an old house which should have been condemned ten years ago. To make matters worse, most of them do not have bathrooms and they share a communal one. The ones with this facility do not have heated showers and we are facing a cold winter right now. They have been forced to take cold showers. Most people except for the rich do not have running hot water. We do not have any in our apartment. Most people have electric shower heads which churn out some sort of hot water to make showering bearable in these cold months. The whole system can seem a little nerve wrecking for those who are not accustomed to it. It is like a electrocution waiting to happen. For us, this is just normal now. These showers are not cheap. Robert’s family could not afford one and consequently have been taking cold showers. We help them with part of the rent. Initially the grandmother was a little hesitant to ask for our help to buy a electric shower head. She did not want us to think that she is taking advantage of us. Robert became ill during the cold weather and I am assuming the cold water baths did not help. We made sure that they had what they needed. One of the youths who used to live in the streets is quite handy with installing them. He is one of the homeless youths who is holding a steady job but even then he can not afford to pay rent. Therefore, he still sleeps in a tent in the streets while working a 9 to 5 job. Sometimes he drops in on this family with some groceries and they feed him.

Robert would not stop crying. He was afraid and suffering. All I could do is to gently pat his soft tiny head and speak softly to him. He heard our voices and then calmed down. He just needed to know that he was not alone. This is the best we could do for him and not only him but for his whole family. Of course we could give a lot of unsolicited advice. We could tell them to have less children or have a better home or any other things that might be running through many people’s minds. It is easier when you are separated from the reality of these lives to solve problems. However, this family and the rest of the youth in their situation are not problems. They are people and they have invited us into their lives. We can see that life offers very little for them. Even so, they do not complain nor ask for much. The grandmother informed us that Maria, another homeless youth has given birth to a baby boy. We have known Maria and her brother, João, since 2013. They were young teenagers then and now she is a mother. She had no where to go and they have opened their home to her. We have no idea how they are able to squeeze so many people into such a tiny space. Besides the two single bed, they also have a stove and a sink.

Visiting hours in the ICU are limited to 30 minutes per day for non family members. We did not need all that time. It is a baby. There is not much one can say to an infant in agony. The grandmother accompanied us out and she apologized for asking us to help with the shower head. She said that we were the only ones she knew who would help. Although this sounds really good for our ego, it is not entirely true. I am sure that they can find a way. However, it reveals something deeper and special. They have received us. We are part of their family structure. They know that we will not make judgments on them. They have enough of that in this life. They need someone to help them know that they are not alone in this world. They need to know that even though their future seems bleak and even hopeless, God always sends someone to remind them that they are His children, too. With His Light they will find a way out of this darkness.