Jesus called them and said to them, “You know that among the Gentiles those whom they recognize as their rulers lord it over them, and their great ones are tyrants over them. But it is not so among you; but whoever wishes to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first among you must be slave of all.” Mark 10:42-44

Someone asked me recently if our ministry with the homeless youth was difficult. Well, the answer is a “Yes” and “No”. The part which most people think is difficult is usually not. Many imagine that our teens would be closed and hostile. In reality, they are very open, even those who are deeply involved in crime. It is a rarity to meet someone who is completely hardened and hostile in the streets. Even the most seasoned criminal is open to us. Of course, there is the violence. It is always looming around the corner but it doesn’t occur as often as one expects. Nevertheless, the fact that the possibility is greater here than elsewhere creates a certain stress. However, we, human beings, have great capacity to adapt. It doesn’t mean that we are accustomed to scenes of violence. Our children and teens are not accustomed to it. It disturbs them too. We just adapt to this reality and become more aware of its threatening presence. It is not difficult but it is not easy either.

Perhaps the most difficult part of our ministry is not easy to identity. With so many immediate needs present among the homeless children, it is hard to discern the real obstacle between us. Nevertheless, the more time we spend with the children and teens, the more we become aware of this distance between us and the children. The reality is that we are from two completely different worlds and it is almost impossible to reconcile them.

We have many things in common with the homeless adults. Most of them shared the same childhood experiences as us. They grew up in a home. It may have been dysfunctional but the structure was there. Most of them once held regular jobs and participated in the life of society. They developed their identity as individuals within the same framework as we did. Then something happened tondeconstruct their whole existence and they became homeless. Many say is their addiction but this is just the symptom, not the cause. Nevertheless, I can easily communicate with the homeless adults when they are not drunk of course. We share the same vocabulary and references. The adults and I derived our understanding of reality from similar foundations. This is not the case with our children and teens.

The homeless children’s life began with a rejection, not acceptance. They were rejected in some shape or form by their families. They felt this rejection in such a strong way that prompted them to abandon their families. Something which goes against the nature of your average child. Usually, children feel secure when they are close to their family. Our children had to distance themselves from their family in order to be safe. Unlike us, they could not construct their personal identity in a structured environment. They were forced to build it among people who are rejected and invisible to society. They had to gather up “scraps” here and there in order to discover their space in this world whereas most of us had a path designed for us to pursue. Our children and teens were given the leftovers and there wasn’t much. However, despite all of this, most of them have done an incredible job.

As a result, we have two different ways of looking at life and solving the problems confronting us.
The way we see a solution to a problem may not be necessarily obvious to the homeless children and teens. Most importantly, they may not be convinced these solutions would work for them. The things we have as priorities may not hold the same weight for them. Consequently, we may judge them as being inapt or clueless about life. However, their life experiences have taught them to employ different tools to confront their problems.
Most people, when they hear of homeless children and teens, think that they should brought to a shelter or an orphanage. We think they should not be alone without any adult guidance. There are many groups, both religious and non-religious, who operated on this principle and have opened up shelters. None of our children and teens go to these places. The idea of being in a closed place surrounded by adults reminds them of the trauma they experienced. Felipe lived in the streets since he was eight. He escaped from a household of violence. In the streets, he found peace among the other children. They became his refuge. The people who abused him in the streets were the police and other adults. These only served to reinforce his idea of authority. The words of Jesus from the above gospel text is good news to these children and teens. They don’t want God to be like the authoritative figures in their lives. It appears as if Jesus understood and spoke the language of our teens.

Personally, I find these words of Jesus to be tough. It is not that I want to be a tyrant and enforce my views upon our children. None of us desire to be tyrants. Instead I would rather be the nice guy who keeps insisting on telling the kids what is best for their lives. In reality, the ways of this world are deeply rooted in us. Our idea of being a servant still contains an authoritative tone. Jesus had a different approach. In the gospels, whenever an ill or physically disabled person was brought to Jesus, He always asked them what they wanted. Sometimes I thought that it was obvious. Nevertheless, Jesus never assumed that he knew what people needed. He allowed the people to inform him of their needs. Then He acted upon their request and refrained from giving them tips to avoid future mishaps. Maybe in one or two occasions He told the people not to sin anymore. They were quite specific situations. In general, Jesus refrained from imposing His ideas. Instead He was a servant who listened to those whom He served.

There are days when I am in the streets and I feel completely useless. Usually it is when nothing good nor bad happens; just a normal day in the streets among the homeless. I have normal conversations and feel a little unsettled in my spirit. I sense an internal pressure to do something more concrete. It was the way I was taught; we always have to be doing something to prove our worth. I was talking to Bruno about something uninteresting and then he mentioned something about Felipe. It has been a couple of weeks since I have seen him. We planned to meet a week ago but the rain postponed it. Bruno said that Felipe was asking about me. Then he decided to be direct. “You should go and see him, he misses you!” It is not that I have been avoiding him. We stay in the streets later now and I get a little tired to go over to Felipe’s house. I promised I would go the next day. Just before I left, Bruno asked me when I was coming to see him again. He always asks me this question. Not just him, I realized that the other children and teens do the same. I heard this question so many times but I never paid attention to it. They were communicating to me what is most important to them while I was fussing over being useless.

A servant listens to those whom one serves. Jesus wants us to be servants. This is good news in a world where no one listens to anyone. Everyone thinks that they know what the other should do or say. Everyone thinks that they know what needs to be done in order for things to get better. Jesus does not want His disciples to be like everyone. He wants us to be different. It is not easy to be different. I realized that Jesus does not want me to be telling our children and teens how to be successful in this life. This is not their priority. They want something else. They want someone to love them despite the fact that we might be from two different worlds. They want to us to just enjoy them. I decided that I was going to listen to Jesus and learn to be a servant who enjoys the people God has put in our lives. Felipe and Bruno and the other teens just enjoy us for being there. They don’t expect anything from us beside this. For them, knowing someone loves them is important for them to have the courage to move forward. They don’t need me to make life easy for them. They just want me to love them. A good servant listens.