Ministry to Children

by

Not Aiming for Happy Endings

“I can be happy with some of the things that I have achieved recently but I am not going to fool myself as well. I know that my happy ending is not to be found in this life. There are many challenges ahead of me. I have many battles to face and I know that I have to face them alone because they waged in my soul. It is good to know that I can know person of Jesus in this life and I don’t have to wait until the next life to see Him. He has been my comfort and counsellor and the strength that is going to help me go beyond my limitations.”- Janaina Prado

Janaina recently posted this on Facebook. Her post reveals the loneliness of her life journey but it is not a loneliness that leads to desperation and hopelessness. She has already walked this path before. Her loneliness is now leading her to the path of solitude; a path of self-discovery.

I remember one specific conversation I had with Janaina about 17 years ago. She was 14 then. She told me about the time she was almost adopted. She was living in an orphanage when a couple from Germany wanted to adopt her. According to Brazilian law, they had to fly to Brazil to meet her before the process was finalized. It was love at first sight for the woman. Janaina said that the feeling was mutual. However, she was not ready to leave her brothers behind. Nothing could convince her to agree with the adoption. Even though she was only eight at that time, the Brazilian law respected the sentiments of the child in the adoption process. Consequently, the family gave up on the process. They could not bear to separate the young girl from her siblings. However, the woman adopted Janaina as her daughter in her heart and never lost contact with her. Unfortunately, her brothers left the orphanage leaving Janaina behind. She eventually ran away and ended up in the streets. Her life in the streets led to drug addiction and her condition went from bad to worse. In her conversation with me, she said that she regretted not leaving with the family to Germany. She imagined her life would have been better if she had taken the bold step and agreed with the adoption. Most people would agree with her. If her story was a fairy tale, we would say that she lived happily ever after in Germany with her kind adopted parents. The people who wanted to adopt her were kind and good people. However, this does not mean that her life would have been a bed of roses in Germany.

We will never know if her life would have been better in Germany. It would have been different. She would have been financially better off and perhaps have a middle class lifestyle. Maybe she might have gone to college and even have a well-paying job. Maybe she might not have learned to overcome the loneliness and discover her solitude with God. Maybe she would never discover the strength to overcome the battles waged in her soul.

Aristotle said that the chief aim of life is live a complete and fulfilled life. According to him, virtues guide us in this path of self-discovery. Material goods and even a comfortable life do not bring us closer to discover this fulfilled life. In many cases, they could be an obstacle. What we define as a happy ending may not necessarily mean the person is on the path of self-discovery. In the conventional sense, it just usually means that they are living a comfortable middle-class lifestyle. However, life has more to offer than this. Janaina is on the path of discovering this and she realizes that she does not need a happy ending to do it.

The joy of her journey is to know for sure that she has everything she needs to live a complete and fulfilled life. She also knows that her life does not just end here but the time here is just part of the journey. Her close and real relationship with Jesus is the answer to help her engage and overcome the inner battles waged in her soul. She knows that she cannot do it by herself and only the strength that comes from the person of Jesus is going to help her. This is not knowledge that has been passed onto her. Her post on Facebook comes from a personal self-discovery. No pastor could have articulated it so perfectly as she did. She wrote this out of her own personal experience.

Someone once asked me what do we consider as a success in our ministry. I would point to Janaina. I would love for the children and teens we know today in the streets to one day discover what Janaina wrote on her Facebook. For us, this would be success. We don’t need a happy ending. We desire that the children and teens discover together with us the path to a fulfilled life.

A Happy Reunion

A Happy Reunion

Share Button
by

Waiting for the Right Time

“The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe in the gospel.”- Mark 1:15

Recently, I watched a youtube instructional video on playing the classical guitar. The very first instructions were to just hold the guitar without playing its strings. This was quite hard because my first instinct is to start strumming on the strings. Just as I was trying to resist the temptation to do this, the instructor said that the problem with many students is that they want to play immediately when they grab the guitar. He seemed to be looking at me when he said this. According to him, this impatience leads to bad habits and poor playing. He emphasized that it was essential for us to know and understand the instrument before rushing into playing it. We were instructed to feel the strings and then to think about what we are going to do and how we are going to do it mentally. Once we get all the steps figured out mentally, only then are we ready to begin. It doesn’t mean that we are going to play beautifully right away. It just means we are ready to begin.

Jesus waited for thirty years before he preached his first sermon on the Kingdom of God. Throughout his ministry, Jesus emphasized in subtle as well as explicit ways the importance of waiting. He did not just wait passively. He submitted Himself to the process of waiting. When he was baptized against the protest of John the Baptist, Jesus said that it was the appropriate way for the time being. John was right; Jesus should be baptizing him instead. However, the waiting process demanded otherwise. Waiting can mean doing things that apparently make no sense to those around us. Jesus spent a bulk of his life as a carpenter. It is strange that there is no explicit reference to his experiences as a carpenter in his teaching. In fact, it seems like they were uneventful years. Why didn’t he start his ministry earlier and die on the Cross at a later age?

Jesus’ ministry did not end at the Cross. The Cross was the beginning of a new phase of His eternal ministry. It marked His transition from prophet and teacher to High Priest and King. As High Priest, He represents not only God to us but also He represents Humanity to God. His qualification to do this comes from the years He spent experiencing all the ups and downs of a regular human being. I guess being a carpenter is as normal as you can get during his time. Regular human life is full of challenges and struggles and everyone has their share of suffering. Jesus is not a High Priest of exceptionally complex cases. He is the High Priest of regular human beings in regular human situations.

He is a High Priest that truly understands human predicament and yet He was able to transcend it. He gives the mundane things in life a new meaning. They are not wasted experiences because they can point us to something that is eternal. Jesus saw that spending thirty years as a carpenter was important. It gave Him the tools to preach the Kingdom of God effectively to the world because He was able to see eternity in the mundane things. If we are unable to see the eternal present in the mundane things, then we won’t be able to preach the Kingdom of God effectively.

‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things. Enter into the joy of your lord.’-Matthew 25:23

We spend hours in our ministry apparently doing mundane things. Our children and teens are so detached from regular human society that doing these things with them brings them back into human society. However, it doesn’t just end there. These times spent with the children prepare the way for us to preach the Kingdom of God. Most important, they prepare us to discern the Eternal Presence of God in the mundane.

Our time of waiting is a time of training our eyes to see the eternal presence in the mundane.

It is easy to miss the importance of doing these mundane things in preparation to preach the gospel. One of the frustrating things for us is perhaps walking for miles searching for these children and teens. It is even worse on the days when we don’t find them. It is easy to feel as if we have wasted our time. However, occasionally some complete stranger comes to us and tells us that he has seen us walking around looking for the children and he wants to know what motivates us to do such things. The only answer we can give is that the Kingdom of God is here and we are here to testify of its goodness.

Share Button
by

An Open Moment

Then He also said to him who invited Him, “When you give a dinner or a supper, do not ask your friends, your brothers, your relatives, nor rich neighbors, lest they also invite you back, and you be repaid. But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind. And you will be blessed, because they cannot repay you; for you shall be repaid at the resurrection of the just.”-Luke 14:12-14

I walked with Igor to the subway station closest to our house. We walked and talked along the way like two ordinary friends. No one would have guessed that Igor was sleeping in the streets just a few months ago. Before parting our ways, he thanked me for the hundredth time for our hospitality. Then he gave me a big warm hug. I walked home feeling grateful for the things God was doing in our lives.

It has been a while since I wrote about Igor. In my previous entry, I wrote about his move to a government-sponsored halfway house called, “Hope for Autonomy”. He is still living there with his girlfriend, Ana Paula. However, many things have changed. The changes are not confined to these two. They have started a chain reaction.

In the beginning of this year, Igor found a job. The thing that made of all us extra proud of him was that he found this job on his own. Initially, Igor was passive about his job search. He was timid and afraid of rejection. Then something changed and made him take a more active posture. I am not sure what changed his attitude towards the job hunt. Maybe it was the fear of returning to the streets. He spent the final weeks of December going around small businesses looking for short-term employment. Finally, someone gave him a chance and ironically it was a small business located about hundred meters away from where Igor used to sleep in the streets. The company delivers mineral water to businesses and residences in the area. It is hard work. Igor has to load about ten five gallon containers in a trolley and push them to their respective destinations. There are no motorized vehicles or anything to facilitate the delivery. Everything is done through pure muscle strength. Most days he walks about three to five miles with this heavy load. It is his first job and he has just completed one month. In his first week of work, we casually walked passed his workplace and saw Igor soaking wet with his own sweat.  It was 100° F (40° Celsius). He waved at us and continued his work without saying anything. We understood. He did not want to be distracted and we walked on by.

The salary is not that great. He does not make enough for him to find a place to rent but spiritually the job is doing wonders for Igor. The other teenagers are impressed when they see Igor walking around delivering the containers of water. They see a possibility for a change as well. Some have asked for our help with documents so that they can apply for jobs. One teenager asked us if we would accompany him in his job search just to give him the confidence he lacks. They are sick of the streets and criminal life. They want to have a honest job even if it doesn’t pay much. This new desire came about by seeing one of their own working.

We managed to get hold of Igor on his lunch break and we asked him about his work. He was honest and told us that it was tough but he acknowledges that it is a good start. Mary offered to continue the English lessons with him if he desired. He told us honestly that when he goes home from work he just wants to rest and sleep. Then we offered him to come to our apartment once a week to have a small meal and just relax there before going home. He accepted our invitation.

It is very hard for the children or the teens to accept an invitation to anyone’s house. For them, it was stepping out of their comfort zone. We were prepared for Igor to be feel a little inhibited on his first visit here. However, we were pleasantly surprised. He appeared to be relaxed and comfortable in our home. He was curious about our books and asked about the kind of books we read. He told us about a particular book that he wanted to read and I told him that I would find it for him.

We casually talked about working life. I mentioned the importance of having a plan or project for our lives and how this would help us not to be discouraged when things are tough. He listened intently. Our conversation slowly drifted to the Bible. He was very curious about God and faith and I proposed that we read the Bible together on Wednesdays. He agreed and he said that he wanted to continue with the English lessons as well.

His second visit took place this week. He was more relaxed this time. He shared about his work and conversations with fellow workers. He was more open and communicative than before. We did a brief English lesson and then read a small section of the gospel of Matthew. It was not a passive Bible study, the kind where I talk and everyone listens. Igor contributed his thoughts and he shared from his experience on how he understood God was working in his life. We ended the Bible study with the understanding that all of us have something to learn from each other. We were all humbled as well as edified by the active presence of God in our lives.

For me personally, it was amazing to see the progress of our relationship with Igor. When we met him for the first time, he had just gotten out of Juvenile detention center. He was sniffing paint thinner and robbing. Now, he is reading the Bible together in our apartment. Life is unpredictable. We don’t know what tomorrow is going to bring us. We don’t what is in store for Igor. The future does not belong to us. God has given us the present moment. At this moment, Igor is open to receive the eternal things from God and we are happy that we are part of it.

Links to previous posts on Igor:

Hope for Autonomy

Igor Has an Address

Share Button
by

Why didn’t I dance

“My favorite thing to do is to take a shower. I never had a shower in my house, in fact, I never had lived in a proper house. It did not have a bathroom or a kitchen. I never slept in a bed when I was a child. I never dreamed that I would have all these things one day. Now I do.”

These were the opening lines of a remarkable book I read over the weekend. It was recommended to me by a homeless teenage girl. Her name is Isabela. She is about 19 and like most of the older teens, she has been living in the streets since she was a young child. Although, unlike the others, she spent a couple of years in a shelter for children until she turned eighteen. Then she was forced to return to her family. She stayed for one day at her aunt’s house and then fled to the streets again. Our conversation did not go further than this. She was not ready to share more and we respected her privacy. Then she surprised us and asked us if we could buy her a book. This was the first time any of the teens or children asked for a book. Most of them dislike to read and naturally we were happy to find one who actually likes to read. She corrected us immediately. She told us that she did not like to read but this particular book touched her. The book is called, “Esmeralda: Why didn’t I dance.” It was a strange title and we had to search for it at several used bookstores before finding it. I open the first page and read the above opening lines of the life story of Esmeralda. I was drawn in immediately.

As I read her story I discovered that Esmeralda was living in the streets when we were working here twenty years ago. To my great surprise, her older brother was someone with whom I had good contact in the past. However, I cannot remember ever speaking to her personally even though her face looks familiar. Her story was similar to many of the children and teens in the streets. She comes from a family living in a tiny shack made out of scrap plywood. They had one mattress and everyone slept on the same bed. They were eight children but four died from illness. The oldest sister was ten years old when a group of men kidnapped and raped her before killing her. Her mother suffered a mental breakdown after this and started drinking heavily. The mother used to force the children to go the streets with her to beg for money. Many times they hardly had any money for food but the mother always found a way to buy alcohol. The shack they lived in did not have a bathroom or a kitchen; they cooked their meals on a makeshift stove using scrap wood as fuel. Consequently, their tiny shack was always filled with suffocating fumes which the children had to endure while eating their meals. This was the world of Esmeralda. It is hard to believe that people could live in such conditions and I would have found it unbelievable if I hadn’t been to some of these homes. However, according to Esmeralda, it wasn’t extreme poverty that led her to the streets. This is an important point to remember. The problem is not just poverty, as extreme and dehumanizing as it may seem. Children can adapt to extreme conditions if they feel that they are loved. And love was the one thing that Esmeralda did not feel in her tiny shack.

Esmeralda’s mother suffered from severe mental illness that made her violent. She would wait for the children to go to bed while they were fast asleep she would attack them. In the morning she would be remorseful. The children were naturally terrified of her. Eventually things got worse for the children. Her mother started bringing strange men to the shack and one day one of them raped Esmeralda. She was about 11. Her older brother had enough and ran away to the center. Esmeralda followed in his footsteps soon after.

Life in the street was not easy for Esmeralda. In her desperation to get money and shelter, she trusted the wrong people and she suffered more abuse. It was a miracle that she was not murdered like her sister. Gradually she got involved in crime and was sent to the juvenile detention center where the guards treated her with violence. By the age of eighteen, she was a hardened crack addict and considered to be a hopeless case.

Esmeralda shares that her faith in God gave her the strength to take the bold step towards leaving the street life. There was no radical conversion experience. It was actually a quiet and reflective process. She said that she found life in the streets to be monotonous. She used drugs not because she was addicted but to escape the monotony. She pleaded with God for the strength for a change. At this particular moment, she felt the presence of God in a real way. This presence opened her eyes to see the people who were willing to help her change her life story. She approached these people for help.

Her journey out of addiction was not an easy one. She had to struggle with the fact that she had to leave behind all her friends who had become very much like her family. She realized that she needed to change her way of thinking about the world and she was clueless how to go about doing it. She started by changing the way she thought about herself. She learned that she needed to love herself and she couldn’t do this until she forgave her mother and not only her mother but all those who wronged her. Then, finally, she had to forgive herself. I won’t say that there was a happy ending because Esmeralda is still young and there is a long journey for her. Esmeralda is happy now because she is where she wants to be emotionally and spiritually. She is in a place where she can learn and grow. For her, this is the perfect way to live her life. She did not want to become rich. She did not mind being poor. Her goal at the end of the book was to finish her high school education and go to college. Things she never thought she could ever hope for when she was a young child. The book ended at this point and it was written 14 years ago. I did some research on her and found out that she did finish her college degree on Anthropology. She continues to learn and grow into her vocation as God’s instrument in this world.

This is the story of Esmeralda. Isabela had already this book once and she wanted to read it again. When I told her that I found the book, her eyes lit up and she wanted to see the book right away. She grabbed it from my hands and held it close to her chest. Her face reflected an intense delight. The story of Esmeralda meant something very important for Isabela. It represented hope for her. Maybe she came from the same background. We don’t know. Isabela is a very private person. We know very little about Isabela and we hope that the story of Esmeralda will inspire her to open up to us. Maybe one day Isabela will share her story to the world as well.

Share Button
by

Unkind Reminder for the New Year

“A voice was heard in Ramah,
Lamentation and bitter weeping,
Rachel weeping for her children,
Refusing to be comforted for her children,
Because they are no more.” – Jeremiah 31:15

It is the New Year. We returned to the streets after a short break with all the joy and excitement one conjures up at the beginning of every New Year. We were hoping for something good this year, something different; none of us can really be sure what this would entail realistically. I think deep down, we are hoping that we would have a deeper connection with the children and teens this year, perhaps they might open their hearts to see us as their spiritual family. We didn’t know what we were expecting but we wanted to see some growth in ourselves and our ministry with the children. We met each other at the foot of the Cathedral where we usually meet. Before we could finish with the customary New Year greetings, it started to rain heavily. We took shelter in the church and waited until the rain lightened up a little. Finally, we got tired of waiting and went out into the weak and still annoying drizzling rain. The streets were wet and the children were no where to be found. Most likely they were taking shelter elsewhere. Our first day we walked around the whole center searching for the children and teens and did not find anyone. We were damp but our spirits were not; there is always the second day.

Today was the second day. It was a beautiful day. It made us feel hopeful again about the New Year. We met at our usual place and immediately after our prayers, one of the teens spotted us and ran up to give us a hug. It was nice to have such a warm welcome. However, then came the bad news. She told us that Mateus was murdered on Christmas Eve. We could not believe it. He was such a sweet boy and only thirteen years old.

Life was never easy for Mateus. He comes from a family living in abject poverty in a neighborhood ironically named Father Christmas’ Garden. His family life was a far cry from any Christmas specials. He was sexually abused at a very young age by a male relative and finally ran away to the streets seeking for a better life. Unfortunately, in the streets, Mateus used sex to survive and the other children used to call him by a derogative name for male prostitutes. Mateus did have some positive influences in his life. He lived in a Christian shelter on and off for several years and he bonded with our friend and fellow missionary, Luke. They formed a deep father-son relationship. However, Mateus was a restless soul and he could not remain in the shelter for long. My understanding was that he did not know how to relate with people who did not want to abuse him sexually. He was about twelve then.

Mateus was soft-spoken and a very gentle soul. He did not engage in any criminal activity except to prostitute himself. Every time he saw us, he would run up to us and give us each a hug. Then he would just stand there without saying anything. He did not know how to proceed from the initial greeting. He suffered from a severe learning disability and he reasoned like a seven year old. Just before Christmas, Mary took it upon herself to teach Mateus how to write. Even though Mateus had been to school while he lived in the shelter, he never learned how to read. However, we had a hard time trying to locate him. He roamed the streets alone and often kept to himself. Sometimes children with similar background would hang out with him, especially the girls. They felt safe with him.

On Christmas Eve, someone lured him to a dark spot under a highway bridge and repeatedly bashed his skull until he died. He suffered a brutal and painful death. His murderer is not from the streets and has no connection with him. His death won’t be investigated because he is a poor homeless teenager. However, for our friend, Luke who knew him more than any of us, Mateus was a special gift of God to him.

Mateus is learning how to write his name just before Christmas.

Mateus is learning how to write his name just before Christmas.

Mary managed to have one lesson with Mateus. We took his picture and developed it to give to him for Christmas. He always wanted a picture of himself. The day we presented his picture, he acted as if he did not care about it. He was being a typical teenager. We knew that he appreciated it. Mary wrote a Christmas card saying that he was special. It was the last thing we gave to him.

This is our first day back and it made us realize why God wants us to be here.

Share Button
by

Almost a Tragic Evening

Inasmuch then as the children have partaken of flesh and blood, He Himself likewise shared in the same, that through death He might destroy him who had the power of death, that is, the devil, and release those who through fear of death were all their lifetime subject to bondage.- Hebrews 2:14-15

I was waiting for the team members in front of the steps of the Roman Catholic Cathedral which is located in the old center of the city. The square pertaining to the church is where many of the homeless have found refuge at least for the past twenty years. In the evenings, some religious and altruistic societies come out to feed the homeless here. Consequently, it has became a the gathering point for the homeless towards the end of the day. While waiting for the team members to arrive, I noticed a man shouting out with much conviction and enthusiasm that he was from a state in the Northeast of Brazil even though he supported the local soccer team. He kept repeating this the whole time I was standing there. For some reason, in his state of insanity, he believed that the whole world should be made aware of this fact. Everyone just ignored this man which infuriated him even more and he started shouting at every passerby. This is quite a common scene among the homeless. Most of them suffer some sort of mental illness and it is not uncommon see people arguing or having heated discussion with an imaginary enemy. My mind was drifting off aimlessly thinking about the people in my surroundings and I can see how easy it is to tip over to the other side. Thankfully, the team members arrived and we found a large group of children and teens in the square.

The children were unusually eager to do activities with us. We were playing all kinds of games and some of them were even in the mood to chat with us. So far everything was going well. In the midst of this, there was another insane homeless woman who was accusing the children that they had stolen something from her. Nobody paid any attention to her including myself. I was having a great conversation with one of the teens. Then, all the sudden, I felt an icy cold liquid running down my hair and within seconds my shirt was soaking wet. I felt someone pouring what felt like a bucket of cold water on me. I stood up and saw that it was the crazy woman and she had emptied a large container of fuel alcohol on me. She was yelling at everyone saying that she meant business. I was really annoyed and confronted her. Then one of the older teens ran up to me and warned me that she had a lighter in her hand. The older teens surrounded her and threatened to hit her. She had a knife and a lighter in her hand and had threatened to set me on fire. I was in a daze for a moment and I heard people telling me to stay away from her. By this time, I began to sense the pungent stench of the alcohol. All the children and teens who are accustomed to violence in the streets were shocked at what had happened. They could not believe that someone would be aggressive to those who come to help them. The insane woman kept trying to light up her lighter and everyone told me to leave right away because I was still in danger. Finally, she gave up and ran away. The children came up to me and asked if I was feeling okay. Strangely, I was not afraid nor angry. I don’t think that I was in a state of shock. I am not even sure that I felt my life was in danger. The children advised me to go home and wash off the alcohol. It was good idea and I told them that I will be back tomorrow.

Some people would say that prayers of the saints protected me last night. I would like to think that this was true. However, I am also aware that there are many innocent people have died tragically last night in some cruel and unexpected way. I have read about people dying in similar circumstances before and on Monday, I could have been one of them. It was unprovoked and unforeseen. It was just someone with a mental illness doing something without a complete understanding of what was happening. I am glad that she wasn’t able to go through with her plans but she has marked my life nevertheless. She reminded me that mortality is something that could come to us at the moment we least expect. Despite what happened, it was a good night and bad things often happen in moments when everything seems to be going well. This is the state of our mortality. It is not something that we can avoid and it is definitely not something that we should fear.

I am going back to the same place today. I think that the lesson I learned from this incident was that I am happy doing what I am doing right now. I am not going to change it. I wasn’t feeling afraid, not because I am a brave man. Bravery is not necessarily a virtue in all situations. I could very well be insane myself and not see the danger. Maybe there might be some truth to this. However, mortality does not make any appointments with us. It just comes and I would like to continue to do what I am doing now when the time comes for me to surrender to my own mortality.

Having said this, prayers for our protection are always welcome.

Share Button
by

Hope for Autonomy

In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.-John 14:2

We met Ana Paula in the streets. She was unusually happy. It is very rare to see her smile which is unfortunate because it really brings out her beauty. I have written about Igor in the past two posts but I hardly said anything about Ana Paula. Well, this is partly due to the fact that she is an enigma to us. She is the mother of Igor’s child, Isabel. They have been together for four years and their child is about two years old. Like Igor, she had lived in the streets all her life, but her parents are still alive. However, she hardly speaks about them. Even those who have suffered abuse by their biological parents mention them once in a while, but not Ana Paula. Besides this, Ana Paula has always been reserved and hardly spoke to any of our team. She was not exactly unfriendly but she tends to withdraw from the world. We heard from a team of mental health workers that she suffers from occasional hallucinations. Sometimes in her rare friendly mood, she would tell us incredible tales of her life but we knew that they were mostly fabricated. However, we were never sure if she knew that they were. She has a difficulty dealing with reality and Igor was her link to the real world. Unfortunately it is a very fragile connection. Therefore, when we saw Ana Paul all happy and beaming with delight, we really not sure what to expect. We didn’t have to wait long to find out; she blurted out uncontrollably that she has a new home.

The government program came through with its promises (the previous post sheds more light on this). They found a temporary place for those who were squatting in the abandoned square. The homeless squatters were sent to two different locations; one was close to the center and the other was about forty minutes away. Igor and Ana Paula deliberately requested the one furthest away from the center. This is a significant development for them spiritually.

Igor and Ana Paula really want a change in their lives. They are tired and weary of street life and they do not want to depend on criminal activity to sustain their livelihood. They believe that the further they are away from the center, the better the chances of them leaving this lifestyle behind them. This outward attitude reveals something that is happening within them. They have reached the point where the Prodigal Son in the famous parable of Jesus was when he realized that feeding the pigs was not the road to abundant living.* However, unlike the young man in the parable, they are not sure of the road back to the Father’s house. It is an internal and spiritual road which each person has to discover by themselves. We cannot take them there. It wouldn’t become real for them if we do, but we support and encourage them in this walk home. Nevertheless, it is journey that they have to discover for themselves. This is their trajectory to autonomy and self-discovery.

Coincidentally, the name of the temporary shelter where they are living is called “Project Autonomy for Life”. Ana Paula wanted us to see it right away and so, we went with her. On the way, she couldn’t stop telling us about this place. I won’t go into details here to bore anyone reading this post but certain keywords she used to describe the place struck me. They were “organized”, “clean”, “discipline”, ”privacy”, “rules” and “curfew”. All the things are completely absent in the streets and she was genuinely excited about all these things. It sounded like they were something she always wanted.

The shelter is not exactly a shelter. People have permanent rooms allocated to them. You cannot come and go as you please. In fact, no one can visit the place without authorization. There is a time period for the residents to stay there. The place itself is a former hotel that was bought and reformed by the government. There are about a hundred people housed here. They are given six months to find a job and rent a place of their own. There are social workers to assist each person in their job search and help them plan towards personal autonomy. Ana Paula wanted us to see her room but outsiders were not allowed to go up. We explained to the person-in-charge who we were and he made an exception. Igor was resting in his room and he was happy to see us. Like proud new owners of a house, they gave us a short tour of their room. It took us less than a few seconds. It looks like any small hotel room, but for them, it was a step towards something better and wonderful. Igor and Ana Paul had everything organized. There was nothing out of place. It would be hard to believe that these two people had spent most of their lives in the streets.

I asked Igor what he thought about this new place. He said that it was nice but he wants his own place soon. He is happy with this first step but he wants stability for more than just six months. He does not want to live by receiving handouts. This is understandable. However, Igor does not understand that when we start with nothing, we need some help. For those of us who have families and a good support system, our help comes from our families. More than anything, Igor needs someone to help him navigate the road to autonomy. Igor and Ana Paula have nothing and they do not know where to start. Then Igor corrected me though. He said that he has a daughter now and he always wanted a family and now he has motivation to move forward. I reminded him that God also has sent us here to be his support and walk with him in this journey. Together we are going to discover the transformative power of the gospel. The gospel is not just going to transform his life but our lives are slowly changing as well. Igor has enriched our lives and we hope and believe we have enriched his as well. This is the power of the gospel. It has taken complete strangers from different contexts and brought them together to see and experience His love in action in the lives of two orphans.

Share Button
by

Igor Has an Address

Whosoever shall receive one of such children in my name, receiveth me: and whosoever shall receive me, receiveth not me, but him that sent me.-Mark 9:37

It is not easy to keep a schedule when you are living in the streets. Igor has never had a reason to wake up at a certain time and keep appointments. He has never lived with anyone who has had a steady daily schedule. Nothing is fixed or constant in his life. He has slept in the streets most of his life but never in the same place. This is quite typical of the homeless children. They make their bed wherever it is possible. One day, it might be under a highway bridge and then the police come and scatter them away from this place. Then they migrate to another abandoned or hidden location until the police find them. This cycle goes on for years. This constant movement and change make it difficult to cultivate any long-lasting relationship. Life in the street is unstable and chaotic. Keeping a schedule does not make sense. It only makes sense for those who have grown up in the stable environment. Igor never could afford such a luxury.

As you can see, it was not an easy task to have regular English lessons with Igor. He could not keep track of the time or days. Despite this, we still managed to squeeze in at least two English lessons before Igor completely disappeared from the streets. At first we thought that he had forgotten our lesson time. Days turned into weeks and there was still no sign of Igor. We started to get worried. We thought that maybe he was arrested but Igor seemed to have given up his criminal activities. Therefore an arrest would be unlikely. No one could give us a coherent answer. Then, by chance, we ran into him one evening. He looked very healthy and happy. He told us that he had left the streets. In reality, he was squatting with a group of people in an abandoned square. He had built a tiny shack of scrap wood. For him, this was the first step towards a better life. He invited us to visit him there and we did.

We had heard of this place before. It was a fenced up public square that the local government had turned into a drop-in center where the homeless could take a shower and wash their clothes. The project did not last long and was shut down due to lack of manpower. The square was abandoned with all its facilities and the homeless population eventually invaded this space. It was now home for several hundred people including families with children. Igor’s shack was the size of a small bathroom. There was just enough space to have a bed and perhaps a small suitcase to keep their clothes. For us it wasn’t much, but for Igor, it was the first time he had a place to call his own.

We knew that the government was going to restart the program and consequently they were going to repossess the square. Igor was aware of this as well but he wasn’t discouraged. He told us that the government was going to provide temporary housing for him and Ana Paula for six months and then they have to find a way to rent a place. Igor needed a series of personal documents in order to apply for jobs and he did not know where to start. Brazilian bureaucracy is not easy to navigate and especially for someone like Igor, it is very intimidating. Frankly speaking, we are intimidated by it as well but we decided to offer our help nevertheless. Igor accepted our offer.

The first step was to get Igor the Brazilian equivalent of a social security number. In order to this, we needed to go to the local post office to register Igor’s name and address. His name was not a problem but Igor did not have a permanent address. Usually he used the address of his aunt but he could not remember the postal code. They could not find the name of the street and we came to an impasse. I could see that Igor was getting a little discouraged. I asked the clerk if they could use any address and she said that it was not a problem as long as he had an address to receive correspondence. I stood there for a moment thinking whether I should risk giving my address. I knew that Igor has been involved in criminal activities. I also know that he wants to have a better life now. He needed a chance. I asked the clerk if I could give my address and she nodded a “Yes” and Igor looked surprised but he tried to hide it. I gave my address and we got Igor’s social security card. Igor was silent as we left the place. However before we said goodbye, he said that he will never forget what I did there. He said that it took courage and risk for me to trust him and then he gave a big hug and held on for a few seconds longer than usual. He said once again that he will never forget what I just did. Something good had happened and I was relieved that I took the risk.

Share Button
by

English Lessons with Igor

I must admit that sometimes my posts seem to be a little erratic. I share about our interactions with some particular child or teenager and then the following weeks there is hardly any news about them.

I do not mean to be erratic. However, this is the nature of the work. Some days we have meaningful interactions with a particular child and then he or she just disappears, not literally of course. The center covers a wide geographic area. The children and teens do not usually stay at one place. They do sleep at the same place every night but they like to wander during the day. The young ones think that life is an adventure. They go from place to place seeking food and frequently causing some mischief along the way; nothing really sinister. They just want to see how much they can get away with in the streets. The older teens don’t like to be in open spaces during the day. They are susceptible to police’s scrutiny. They feel safer if they move around to avoid any suspicion. We have to wander around as well in order to find them and when we do, they are usually high from sniffing paint thinner or another form of drugs. We have to wait for the right moment to speak with them. Usually we get this chance perhaps with at least one child or teen almost everyday but not always with the same child or teen. This is why there is not always a follow-up story in my posts. However, this time I am going to do something different. Something new is happening. We are excited but at the same time we are cautious. We don’t want our excitement to rush things or create unrealistic expectations. We are excited about a young man named Igor. I want to share his story but it is impossible to do so in one post. It is a story of a relationship that has been slowly developing over the past year. It is not just Igor’s story but it is also our story.

I mentioned Igor before. Actually I have mentioned several Igors. It was a popular name in São Paulo twenty years ago. Consequently, there are several different Igors about the same age in the streets. This particular one came to the streets when he was 8 years old. It was the tragic death of his mother that drove to the streets. She was killed over a trivial argument and the life of her son was changed forever. Igor’s father had died in prison a few years before and he was all alone in this world. His aunt took him in out of obligation and Igor sensed this strongly. As an eight year old child, he made a decision which no child of this age should ever make in an ideal world. However, he did not live in an ideal world and he ended up in the streets. Crime and drugs are part of the street life so is incarceration and Igor experienced all of these. By the time he was eighteen, he had been incarcerated fifteen times. He told us that he never cared for anything or anybody. He would leave the detention center and go back to the streets to rob. He did not believe that life had anything to offer him. Then he fell in love with another homeless teen, Ana Paula. She is four years older than him with a similar background. The two orphans found solace in each other. It did not take long before Ana Paula was pregnant and Igor was incarcerated for the last time as a minor during her pregnancy. Igor told us that it was the first time he seriously thought about changing his life. This time when he left the detention center, he was determined not to return.

When we first met Igor, we did not know much about him. Only thing we knew was that he was interested in languages. He had memorized some French phrases just from hearing some Africans speaking to each other. He told us that he always wanted to speak in English and French. We asked him if he was interested in learning English. He said that he was willing to learn anything if he was given the chance. This was the beginning of a series of English lessons with Igor.

Share Button
by

Grace Beyond our Neighborhood

“Why should we spend time and money helping the street children who have nothing to do with my church’s ministry and neighborhood?”

Only someone like Silas would dare to ask this question and it was one of the reasons why I liked him. I used to walk home with Silas from the seminary. We were both studying at the Presbyterian Seminary in São Paulo. His church was in the northern part of the city which is not too far away from the center. Yet, he was totally unaware of the reality of the homeless children and teens living there. They were just forty-five minutes away from his neighborhood. However he wasn’t convinced that it was necessary for his church to be burdened with this problem. It was forty-five minutes away from his reality.

I haven’t seen Silas for fifteen years. I lost contact with him. Some told me that he is a pastor of a church now. Most likely he has forgotten about me or at least this conversation. I haven’t been able to forget his question ever since. Mainly because I could not answer him immediately. I was unprepared for it. I have always assumed that every Christian saw the necessity of reaching out to these neglected and forgotten children. Silas proved me wrong. It is not that he was a cold hearted man. To the contrary, he was a compassionate man who was involved in the social programs of his church. Above all, he was a sincere and dedicated Christian. This is why I haven’t forgotten his question. I came to realize that it is a relevant question and deserves a well thought out answer. Many good Christians might be wondering the same thing but are afraid expressing their thoughts would make them seem callous.

Moreover the law entered, that the offense might abound. But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound-Romans 5:20

This was St.Paul’s motivation to step out of his familiar circles to preach the gospel. He was a Pharisee and a prominent Jewish leader. In his time, he would have been a very effective apostle to the Jewish community. After all, no one understood the observances and intricacies of the Jewish religion of his time than a Pharisee like him. However, he chose to go to the Gentiles. His reason for this is; “where sin abounded, grace did much more abound”.

It is important for us to know that missionary work or rather, the work of the gospel is not social work. Social work is limited within geographical boundaries and each society must fulfill its obligation in resolving its own social problems. However, the vocation of the church has little to do with social work. We address conditions which social work avoids. This is because we bring something which sets us apart from all social programs. We bring the message of grace. It is all about grace. Although, we cannot address grace if we do not address “sin”. Grace overcomes sin and if we are not clear about what we are overcoming, then we won’t be confident about the healing power of grace.

We usually think about “sin” in the narrow sense. We think about it in terms of specific acts. It is understandable why we would be embarrassed to talk about sin in this sense. We feel like prigs who are poking our noses into other people’s intimate lives. However, ‘sin’ is broader than mere acts. When we walk down the streets of São Paulo, we see lonely and abandoned people and children. We see children without any family support or maybe they don’t even know what it means to have a family. We see people trying to kill themselves slowly with drugs because they feel that life is not worth living. We see people who are completely isolated and forgotten even though they live in the seventh largest city in the world. I am not just talking about the homeless or the poor. I am talking about regular people in their busy lives, going to work and rushing home to limited time with other family members who are subjected to the same pressures and loneliness. They hide their loneliness and isolation and hopelessness behind material things. However, they cannot hide it from themselves. This loneliness and isolation is present is the state of sin that grace seeks to overcome. It is the universal state of humans. The homeless and poor cannot afford the façade of the other people. Their lives display this sinful state for everyone to see. Unknowingly they exposed the fragility and failure of our human efforts to overcome our sense of emptiness. This is perhaps why most people do not want to see them. They are afraid that they might see themselves in the homeless. It is better to forget they exist than to see the reality of our souls in them. We cannot face this reality unless our hearts and minds are consumed by the power of grace. Grace not only gives the courage and wisdom to testify to its power over bleakness and desperation, it compels us to seek and share its goodness to those who are lost.

We work in the streets knowing that the social programs cannot bring the healing that these children and teens are seeking. Social programs cannot overcome this sense of abandonment and loneliness in their souls. We don’t have a magic formula to heal this emptiness but we can testify about what is real to us. We can testify to the healing presence of grace. This grace has brought peace to our hearts and given us a sense of belonging, not in a subjective manner but in a holistic way. It gives a sense of belonging that changes our practical lives, not the kind of belonging one feels to a church or some religious group. It has given us a sense of belonging to the One whom we call our Father. It is because He is our Father, we are called to share His grace to those who are lost and abandoned in this world because He is their Father as well. This is why we should care about people beyond our neighborhood, borders and cultures.

Share Button