The Pharisees came and asked Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” testing Him. Mark 10:2
“Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God. Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.” And He took them up in His arms, laid His hands on them, and blessed them. Mark 10:14-16
I used to think that the central theme of this gospel passage was divorce. I also used to have a simplistic view about these things. I told myself that I would stand against divorce because Jesus disapproved of it. I read this gospel passage in church one Sunday. More than half my congregation were divorced and into their second marriage. They were in the church and I assumed that they were desirous to live their lives for God. Most importantly, I knew and loved them. I was aware of their struggles. Consequently, I decided to preach on something else. Today I am not going to avoid the subject.
The Pharisees were asking a strange question. They wanted to know if God endorsed rejection. They wanted to know if a man could reject his wife in favor of another. It was a trap because they knew that Jesus was against any form of rejection. Jesus gave the perfect answer. Divorce was allowed in the Law because people are cruel and violent. Jesus spoke out against divorce in his time because it was used as a means to discard wives after men got tired of them.
To be discarded is the worst thing that could happen to a human being. Our children and teens would prefer to be hated and despised than discarded. No one thinks about you anymore when you are unwanted. Women had a limited role in Jesus’ society. Being divorced meant that one of their primary roles was stripped away from them. The women had no voice in the question of divorce. They had to endure the rejection and isolation on their own. No one spoke on their behalf. The Pharisees were only interested in knowing if a man had the right to divorce his wife. They did not think much about the women in this matter. However, Jesus was thinking about the women in His response.
Children in ancient times were also disposable things. Today we have made some impressive progress in this aspect but there is a long way ahead of us. Things were definitely worse in the past. A casual reading of a fairy tale from the Grimm Brothers will remind us of what people thought about children back then. Hansel and Gretel were left in the forest because there was not enough food for the whole family. It was the logical thing to do at that time. The children were unproductive members of the family and therefore, they had to go unless they could prove their worth. This was the so-called happy ending of the story for those who can remember. It is a terrible story and maybe I have ruined it for everyone. It was a common idea then that children were dispensable. This idea still prevails. Unfortunately, we live in a place where children continue to be exploited. Our children in the streets are not unlike Hansel and Gretel. Gabriel told us once in complete seriousness that he was helping his mother by sleeping in the streets. She has one less mouth to feed, he said.
The apostles sternly opposed the children’s presence and turned them away from Jesus. The disciples were not being unkind. They were just products of a culture where children had to prove their worth before they could be taken seriously. Jesus was different. He wanted the children to come to Him. He made them first in a world where they were considered last.
Women and children were given the priority in Jesus’ ministry. Children were considered the model of our faith whereas the women were the first to testify the most significant events in the gospels: His Incarnation and His Resurrection. In almost every crucial moment in Jesus’ life, there was a woman present. Mother Mary was a significant presence in His first miracle. A Gentile woman was the only one to win an argument against Jesus… there are just too many to site. These examples could be easily missed if we are reading the gospels or the Bible from a different perspective. However, it would be silly to think that women and children hold a special place because they are more spiritual or holier than the rest. The reason for their special status in the gospels is that they were ones who were rejected and overlooked in Jesus’ society and this attitude continues to the present day. God chooses to see things from the perspective of the underdogs or scapegoats of society. The Pharisees were trying to make their case from their position of authority and power. They wanted Jesus to admit that the Law was on their side. Jesus just pointed out that the Law recognizes their cruel and hardened hearts. Then He stood by those who were rejected and despised.
After almost five years of knowing him, Wanderson finally shared with us about his time in an orphanage. He was there together with his siblings for a long time until a couple adopted him. However, initially he refused to be adopted. He wanted to be his siblings. The couple decided to adopt all of them together. He only had good things to say about this couple. Then Mary asked him why he was in the streets. He could not answer her. He is not the only one. Bruna shared a similar experience. She was in a convent for orphans and then she was adopted by a family. She loves them deeply. She visits them from time to time. However, she would not stay with them. All you have to do listen attentively to their stories and you will hear the fact that they remember being rejected by their biological mother. They were discarded by the one who was suppose to love and embrace them. The rejection is still deeply implanted in their hearts. It was the first thing they encountered in this life and it continues to haunt them. They cannot go through life without feeling this fear that they are going to be discarded at any moment.
Rejection from the one who was supposed to love you unconditionally. How can anyone recover from such a painful rejection? There are many in this world who walk around carrying this pain and loneliness in their soul.
The gospel is not magic. There are a lot of magicians disguised as Christians today. They think everything will be solved by “accepting” Jesus. This is the not gospel of Jesus. Jesus works with us where we are. He starts by sitting next to those who hurt and rejected in this world. He starts by looking at life from their perspective. He starts by listening to them in order to understand their pain and loneliness. Most importantly, you can never find anywhere in the gospels where He gives quick and easy cures to people who are suffering and rejected. Only one who claims to have the power to give such instant results is the devil.
I have often heard about the high divorce rate and the failure of marriage, etc.etc. However, Jesus is not interested in this statistic. He is interested in the souls that have sensed the pain of rejection and isolation. I would imagine that a church that truly follows Jesus would be one filled with people who are divorced, women and men who are abandoned and rejected, and children who have a constant fear of being forgotten and all the scapegoats of our present society. I think that our reading of the gospel will be very different then.
