I don’t know how we got onto the topic. Bruno asked about suicide. Thankfully, this is not a major issue among the homeless youth. In our time here, there has only been one suicide attempt. Actually the very person who attempted it was listening to our present conversation. It was Guilherme. He suffers from symptoms of depression, at least, according to my extremely sparse knowledge on the subject. Most days he is fine. However, he goes through frequent periods when he shuts himself off from the rest of the world. One day when he was in such a state, he stopped and saw us. He wanted to say something to us and then he just turned around and walked away without even acknowledging our presence. We know that it is nothing personal. Guilherme does the best he can. This year he had an incident. Thankfully, there were no permanent consequences. Now, he is feeling better. However, Bruno wasn’t asking the question because of Guilherme. He was in his philosophical mood today. He wanted to know if there is forgiveness for suicide victims.

It seems like recently most of our conversations revolve on the subject of death. Even Felipe shared that he has been having nightmares about death and destruction. Well, it has been a difficult year. The pandemic has confronted us with our mortality. Even though everyone is trying to go on with business as usual, its threat is looming in the background. Our youth sense it. They are more sensitive than people give them credit. They are in the streets all day and night. They sense threat and danger intuitively. On the other hand, we only receive our information through media which is filtered and devoid of any real human contact. Our youth come in direct contact with the people in the streets. Consequently, they are also exposed to all the dangers of the pandemic. They just deal with the pandemic like many of the other dangers they experience in the streets.

“Meaningless! Meaningless!” says the Teacher. “Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless.”

I don’t know how it happened but our conversation brought us to Book of Ecclesiastes. Bruno was surprised that the Bible has such nihilistic expressions. He actually used this term. It is quite amazing that a young man who spent most of his early childhood in an orphanage and then his teenage years homeless has such a wealthy vocabulary. I told him that it gets worse. The author is brutally honest and can leave his readers feeling like him. Bruno’s curiosity perked up. I explained that the author writes from a perspective of a wise king who has accessed to everything he desired. He decided to embark on a search for meaning and indulged in all the pleasures life could afford without succumbing to hedonism. Wisdom was his primary objective. His final conclusion was that life is meaningless. However, the story does not end there. It is actually the beginning of something new. We won’t be ready for the new if we don’t realize the futility of the present reality.

Bruno admitted that he hardly knew anything about the Old Testament. He knows stories about the kings especially David and Solomon. I had never really given serious thought to this. The Old Testament started out as a story of simple shepherds and then somewhere along the way, kings and politicians usurped the narrative. It became a story of the elite and the common everyday people were a mere background to these stories. Everyone looked to the authority or the king in their case to show them the way. Very little has changed today. The common and everyday people are reduced to mere statistics and often lumped together without any heed to their individuality. The focus is still on the people at the top of society’s hierarchy to give us the answers for our happiness and significance. The answer we get from them is unsatisfactory. If they were humble and wise like the preacher of Ecclesiastes, they would give us the same answer. “Everything is meaningless.” However, I see Bruno before me. He has literally nothing. He doesn’t all the opportunities even the average Brazilian has and yet he is hopeful. He does not have idealistic view of life. He has experienced the most brutal blows this life can offer. I asked Bruno, “Do you think life is meaningless?” He disagrees. It is because he is looking at life from a different perspective. It is one that the Christmas story redeems. It is the one that dominates the New Testament. It is a narrative of the common people.

Mary was a young teenage girl. In her society, she had no voice nor place except to be a mother. Christmas elevated her motherhood. The shepherds in the fields were insignificant people in society. There was no great expectation placed upon them to change the world. Yet, they are remembered throughout the world for their testimony of the little infant lying in the manger. The apostles were fishermen, tax collectors and idealists. No one expected much leadership from this crowd. Christmas opened the doors for these people to be remembered for thousands of years. Jesus healed many people who were never named and yet their stories are read everywhere in the world. Jesus came into the world to give these people a space in a kingdom which never ends. The gospel is virtually void of stories of kings and politicians. Beginning with His birth, Jesus redeemed the narrative of life from those who have nothing to offer into the hands of those whom society has ignored. Therefore, if we want to look for the meaning of life, we need to stop looking for it the wrong places.

There was never really a conclusion to our conversation. Bruno had to process some things. I needed to process them too. Perhaps, it is good that this year Christmas is going to be different. It is going to be less hectic and maybe even more contemplative than the previous years. Due to the pandemic, our friends who spent almost every Christmas Day with us won’t be doing so this year. In fact, this year we hardly saw them. However, this year we discovered something special. We found genuine friendship among our homeless youth. Before, we said that we ministered to them but now they have become our friends. They have become our family. They have helped us listen to the narrative of the Emmanuel in their lives. Life has become more meaningful to us in the period while death is quietly looming in the background.